Passionate About Purple!

It's no secret that Wil's favorite color is purple! From lollipops to crayons, purple is always his first choice.  He's simply passionate about purple!  Right before Christmas he decided that he needed purple underwear.  Knowing that Mema will go to the ends of the earth for him, he submitted his request to her.  It came as no surprise that boys underwear was not readily available in purple, but not wanting to disappoint Wil, she purchased white underwear and a box of dye and went to work.  The result was a one-of-a-kind pair of perfectly purple underoos for my perfectly passionate one-of-a-kind boy! 

Letting Go...

Isn't is it funny how as parents we can't wait to be done with the sleepless nights, diapers, bottles and laundry associated with that tiring baby stage?  Until at last, we are.  And then, all at once we find ourselves nostalgic—wishing we didn't wish it all away.

Although Wil potty trained several months ago, I couldn't bring myself to throw out the single diaper pictured here. Removing it would mean closing the final chapter of Ty and Wil's babyhood, but with Ty's 5th birthday around the corner and Wil's 4th coming up in April, it was undeniably time to let go.  So, with much ado, I tossed the unused diaper into the trash today.  It's estimated that the average baby uses 6000 diapers in a lifetime, so  isn't it ironic that after 12,000 dirty diapers, this perfectly clean diaper was the hardest one to throw out?

With it all behind me now, I get teary-eyed thinking about folding warm-out-of-the dryer onsies; the refrigerator doors filled with fresh bottles of formula; the baby powder smell of the stacked diapers and the gratification of rocking my newborn babies back to their peaceful rest in the wee hours of the morning.  It was so much work, but I wouldn't have traded the experience for anything. 

I've heard it said that parenting is the hardest job you'll ever love.  Ain't that the truth.

The Pop-Shop!

After several barbershop visits ending in tears, Pop bought a pair of clippers and opened for business!  His only two clients are Ty and Wil, but they keep him plenty busy!  The boys still shed a few tears, mainly at the end when they are getting tired, but overall it's an event that everyone looks forward to.  Each haircut comes with a complimentary bath from Grandma and a homemade cookie!  The boys tip well with hugs and kisses and the all important high-five.  Pop probably won't get rich with his little side business, but I imagine it makes him feel like a million bucks being able to make childhood memories trimming these little noggins!

Happy New Year!

Ella, Jack, Ty and Wil celebrate the incoming new year in pajama style!

Best Christmas Yet!

At every age and every stage, I think to myself it can't get any better than this! And, then it does! It took me a while to figure it out, but I now realize that whatever age my boys are at is my favorite.  And, this winter has been no exception.  Ty and Wil, at ages four and three respectively, have enjoyed all the wonder that winter and the Christmas season brings. From the early snowfall to the expectation of Santa Claus, their joy has brightened each and every day. 

I think the thing I love most is that they are beginning to have an expectation as to what comes next. On the way home from trick or treating at the Meyer's on October 31st, I remember Wil asking, "So, what's next?" and Ty answering, "Thanksgiving.  Right, Mommy?"  And, a few days before Thanksgiving, they asked how many days till Santa Claus comes?  When can we go sleigh riding?  The following week, as we were on our way home from getting the Christmas tree Ty pointed out that everyone else in our neighborhood had their Christmas lights up except for us.  And, Wil chimed in with the fact that we hadn't yet written letters to Santa.  They don't miss a trick!

In fact, our children have a big hand in creating the traditions we celebrate as a family.  They add life to the traditions of the past, but they discover new ones for themselves.  I remember last year, Ty asked for a Gingerbread House Decorating Kit that we saw while shopping one day. I bought it, we had a blast decorating it and presto a tradition was born!  It takes a lot of pressure off me knowing that we're in this together; that we can make it up as we go!

Christmas has now come and gone and we'll soon be packing up all of the expectations and traditions in a sturdy box and begin preparing for what's next...Ty's fifth birthday in February followed by Wil's fourth in April. I have a feeling I'm going to just love this next stage!!!

[See more pictures of Christmas 2008 in the Photo Gallery.]

Saying Good-Bye to Great Grandma

On Monday, September 15, 2008 we sadly lost Great Grandma. Mary Fulton died at age 90 from natural causes in her own home.  She was the last of the Great Grandparents to pass, but the only one that my boys are likely to remember because of their young age.  

Great Grandma was an amazing lady by anyone's account.  She was a soft-spoken, gentle and graceful soul who we were all sad to see leave the earth, but knowing the beautiful, long life she lived made her passing a little easier. 

Ty and Wil attended the services for Great Grandma, and much to my own surprise they took it all in stride.  They were appropriately sad, but their grief was  offset by their curiosity over the new experience.  The questions were unending, but John and I were able to answer most of them with confidence.  Keeping it simple and heartfelt was our strategy. 

This is a picture of Great Grandma with her only son and three grandsons surrounding her.  Expecting that this would most likely be her last time joining us on the family vacation, moments before we departed the beach house we all gathered in the family room to honor her as a family. We sang happy birthday (she'd be celebrating her 90th a few weeks later), we held hands and prayed over her.  It was a special moment in that it offered peace and closure for even the littlest members of our family. 

Ty and Wil still ask frequently about Great Grandma.  They ask if we think she's happy in heaven and if she misses them.  Since I know both are true, I always answer with a resounding YES!  During Great Grandma's last years she made and gifted each child, grandchild and great grandchild with a crocheted afghan.  Ty's blanket has blue stripes and lies neatly at the base of his bed.  After we buried Grandma the weather turned cooler and I was able to start covering him up with the thick afghan.  As I tuck him in, I always remind him that this is Great Grandma's way of watching over him.  As he closes his eyes peacefully I can see how comforted he is by her continued presence in his life.

Rising Soccer Star...maybe next year!

Can you believe that this is the same little boy who was BEGGING us to play soccer for the last year?  No, he's not benched, just a case of stage fright—field fright—perhaps.

He was having a lot of fun right up until game day: going out with Daddy to purchase all of his equipment; walking the field for the first time; receiving his uniform; the first practice...all great!  But, when that whistle blew to commence the first game, Ty turned around and ran right off the field, sat down and wouldn't budge!

John who was the acting coach was confused! "Hey, Ty! Where are you going?  Wrong way, buddy!" 

There was no turning back—not that day, nor any day until the close of the season.  He participated in every practice and was actually very good, but he wanted nothing to do with playing an actual game.

We're not completely sure why he felt the way he did, but we let it go. Hopefully, next year, he'll be more inclined to get out there and show off his skills.  Although, just yesterday he told me I could sell his cleats, so maybe not!

Baseball, anyone?

The Big City!

My job has brought me to New York City more often than usual in the last few months. Each time I'd go, Ty would ask what it's like in the "big city" and if he could come with me.  So, after several months of him asking I finally found a light day to bring him along. We had so much fun! 

All of the things that I normally find routine were suddenly infused with childlike excitement and curiosity.  From the train ride, to the cab, to the sidewalk hot dog—everything held new meaning.  Seeing the city through Ty's eyes was an unexpected and wonderful experience for me. 

Most exciting of all though was our (2 hour) stop at FAO Schwarz.  Ty was in utter amazement at the size of the store and the endless aisles of toys.  His jaw dropped when we came upon the truck section.  He knew he was being treated to a new toy and spotted his pick immediately.  It was the New York City garbage truck pictured below—a bargain at $55.00!  We (I) carried that enormous red bag throughout the streets of NYC for the rest of the day.  I can't say it was the best part of my day (especially when it started to pour 10 blocks from Grand Central with no cabs in sight!), but the happiness in Ty's heart was worth every grueling step!

Wil's First Day of Preschool

Today was Wil's first day at preschool and as expected he LOVED it!  Wil—like his Uncle Joe—is a born student! We knew this from the start and continue to marvel at his thirst for learning. He is driven to understand the world around him, so much so that he often has a hard time falling asleep. He simply can't shut down his brain long enough to close his eyes. I watch him lay in bed at night counting the stripes on his blankets, reciting his ABC's or examining his fingers.  I've actually said to him, "Stop thinking and go to sleep!" 

Upon delivering Wil to his classroom, he needed no introduction; he jumped right in!  I suppose this is mainly due to him being familiar with big brother Ty's routine, but also because this boy was meant for school.  Miss Danielle, Wil's teacher, said he was a breath of fresh air!  Wil's asks tons of questions and invites the opportunity to learn something new at every turn—a teacher's dream I imagine!

I hope that Wil's love affair with learning will last a lifetime.  Maybe he'll bring it as far as Uncle Joe and become a surgeon!  In any event, I know he'll have fun getting to wherever he's going!

Tattoo Momma!

Yup, in a highly unanticipated move this momma gotta tattoo!

Although, unexpected, I can assure you that I did not enter into the decision lightly or without plenty of forethought. Ever since I adopted my sons, I've been struggling for a way to express how the experience has changed me. Much of the writing I do in this blog has helped me to articulate the profound affect my boys have had on my life, but even my own words have not seemed like enough at times.

Mothers who give birth to their children usually have stretch marks, incision scars or their bodies have simply changed in some way. And although they might find their battle scars unsightly, they are symbolic of the lives they have brought into this world. Adoptive mothers have scars, too, but they wear them on their hearts. And, although I have my fair share of those, I am an artist who is very visual. For me, seeing is believing or in this case, remembering.

The intertwined "heart & triangle" are the international symbol for adoption. The "heart" represents the love that must be present for an adoption to take place and the three points of the "triangle" represent the birth parents; the adoptive parents and the adopted children. I added the "butterfly" as a way of honoring my boys' birth mother, Amy. I think of her as a free spirit, who gracefully floated into our lives, leaving behind two little miracles. Without Amy, I would never have had the opportunity to become a mother and for this I am eternally grateful. I hope in some small way, this gives her an idea of how much she is a part of me.

[Special thanks...To my friend Megan Gibson for the moral support during my appointment and for the margaritas afterwards!  Tattoos hurt—don't let anyone tell you different!  To my friend Deanna Ryan who took the photo of the tattoo with Ty's hands on each side. And, to my friend Carrie Schaetzke who helped me bring my concept to fruition in Adobe Illustrator. The tattoo was inked by Michele Myles of Daredevil Tattoo, New York City, New York.]